Something that Lizzo said at the 2023 Grammys got me thinking. She spoke about how when she first started releasing her music, talking about self-love wasn’t fully normalized (with the implication being how now it is so much more normalized). It’s so very true! As a society, we are coming more and more around to deeply accepting and celebrating ourselves and seeing things like having a self care routine as essential, not vain or selfish.
It’s beautiful that we’re at this point in the history of humanity! The fact that I’m even sitting here writing about self care assuming you already understand how deeply important self care and self-love are is just a beautiful realization.
But lately, I’ve been considering how to take it a layer deeper.
We need to no longer think of self-care as ONLY relaxing and recharging our batteries with things that make us feel really good or are considered strictly ‘healthy.’ It’s time to radically love and accept ourselves even when we’re not necessarily following ALL of our healthy habits. RADICAL SELF LOVE is the way forward, and the way deeper when it comes to your own self care routine.
The Law of Flexibility
How can you be more flexible with your mindset, life, work and self-care routines? As a species, flexibility isn’t a natural strong suit. MANY of us get stuck in rigid ways of thinking or continue coasting along with our habitual ways of being simply because we’ve always done them that way.
When we can infuse more flexibility into our mindset and how we handle things like managing our time and giving ourselves time for self-care, we can grow with and evolve with our routines and habits.
It’s Not All or Nothing
There are all kinds of ‘fraction-based’ ideas of how to instill balance… but the bottom line is that it’s never all or nothing when it comes to creating self-care routines and healthy habits.
You don’t have to stick to your healthiest routines or ways or practice self-care every single day to be worthy, valid and more than enough.
Ground Your Mindset + Self Care Routine in Purpose
Are you following your routines and habits simply because you have always done it that way before? Are you journaling at the end of the day, even when you’re feeling more called to do it in the morning one day? Or are you sticking to the same workout at the same gym, when your body is more called to hikes in the woods?
As we spoke about, in instilling flexibility, we have to be able to revise as we go – this is one of the best tips I have for creating healthy routines that stick. When you’re too rigid with yourself, you’re much more likely to abandon your self care routine and mindset work.
We mustn’t just keep doing things that we’ve always done but rather consider the reason why we are doing something. Ground yourself in your purpose and values, and if that habit or self care routine isn’t aligning, then maybe it’s time to switch it up!
“Controversial” Self Care Routine Ideas
One of my favourite things about my work with clients is helping them disprove the beliefs they’ve long held simply because society has always told them that. For example, there’s such a vision and idea that a self care routine must look a certain way to be valid or healthy. And watching television isn’t always seen as one of those things. But for myself and many others, mindfully watching an hour or two of tv is actually incredibly restful and restorative.
I also find studying and reading a wonderful way of self-caring, but I used to feel that was weird and meant I was nerdy or couldn’t fully relax. But it makes me feel good and restored – that’s ALL it needs to be to be self care.
Bottom line: your version of self care and your self care routine doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s, and it also doesn’t have to make sense to anyone else.
Measure Life in Fulfillment, Rather Than Success
One of the greatest ways to instill self care into your everyday life is to measure your life in terms of how internally fulfilled you feel, rather than the external successes and what you accomplish. It’s not that having goals and achieving them isn’t beautiful and wonderful. Still, when we constantly measure our own sense of worth and happiness in this way, we’re actively putting our happiness in the hands of external sources we can’t control.
Make an active part of your self-care routine the habit of discovering, connecting, and grounding in what makes you feel deeply fulfilled.
The WHAT of this will look unique to you, but I’m here as your guide to help you rediscover that…
Bottom line: RADICAL SELF LOVE , filled with FLEXIBILITY, and in pursuit of FULFILLMENT, is the way forward and deeper when it comes to your mindset + self care routine.
Watch The Fulfilled (Free) Masterclass
In the FULFILLED Masterclass, you’ll learn how to…
- shift your focus from outward success to inner fulfillment
- dedicate yourself to your most creative + fulfilled self
- understand how to create sustaining life-changing habits
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