You can give yourself no greater gift than radical self-love, care and approval. At the time of writing, we’re approaching the 2023 holiday season. As I considered what to write and blog about this season, I decided to highlight two of the greatest GIFTS we can give OURSELVES that don’t cost a thing…
The gifts of self-love and gratitude.
Click to read the companion post to this blog post, “The Gift of Gratitude”
What does it mean to have “Self Love?”
I understand and have compassion for the fact that a term like ‘self-love’ can seem a bit ambiguous. But having a deep sense of self-love, respect, and compassion means that you…
- Have deep belief in yourself and your ability to handle whatever comes your way
- See yourself as deeply worthy of attention and time.
- Respect yourself and uphold your values and boundaries.
- Deeply believe that no matter what, you’ll always be okay.
- Accept and celebrate all the aspects of who you are.
- Have deep empathy for the parts of yourself that you’ve ‘outgrown’ or are still healing, and accept these parts as also beautiful
- Feel worthy of having your own insights and opinions without having to justify them to others
What makes you feel deeply LOVED and appreciated? How can you give that TO YOURSELF?
Benefits of “Self Love”
So why actually take the time to practice and FOCUS on self love? There are so many mind, body and soul benefits feeling deep self love and respect…
- You’re actually more productive when you’re kinder to yourself. This one makes alot of sense when you think about it. When caught in the depths of self-criticism, you will feel defeated and continue down a spiral of negative emotions rather than ‘getting done’ what you gotta do!
- You’re more relaxed – Harsh self-criticism activates our sympathetic nervous system (fight or flight), pumping cortisol into our system, a chemical that makes us feel incredibly stressed within our nervous system.
- You feel more motivated and empowered to take action
- It helps regulate our emotions – research shows that self-love is associated with increased activity in the prefrontal cortex, the area of our brain responsible for self-awareness and self-control.
Affirming Self Love
Self-love is more than just shallowly chanting affirmations in the mirror… but the thing is that an empowering affirmation can work if it’s deeply emotional and meaningful for you.
At the core of why we may struggle with self-love is the core ‘hot thought’ that we believe about ourselves… one of the most common here is “I am not enough”
To catch you up, a ‘hot thought’ is a concept from CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) – a “hot thought” is a thought that directly relates to a change in our emotional state.
What has this got to do with affirmations?
If you are to rework one of your hot thoughts into an empowering affirmation, it is extremely beneficial – because it’s also building a positive identity around who you are and wishing to see yourself as.
I personally struggle with the core hot thought of not being enough, so continually replacing that thought with the script of “I am enough” or better yet, “I am MORE than enough” is allowing me to rework this connection in my brain.
Positive affirmations take intention and repetition to make an impact. If you envision your brain being like a wild, untamed field, working regularly with a positive affirmation is like continually walking back and forth until you create a clear path through that grass.
Affirmations for Self Love + Care
I am WORTHY of self love + care
I am LOVED and LOVEABLE
I am enough, and I always will be
I already have everything I need within me
Joy and happiness are my birthrights
I am abundantly joyful and rich in love
I love myself fully and unconditionally
I am the master of my mind
There is no one else on this entire planet with the exact set of gifts as I
I am beautiful inside and out
I can handle this; there’s nothing I can’t handle!
Vulnerability is brave and a sign of strength; never a weakness.
Techniques for Cultivating Self-Love
- Start + keep a journal where you have space to work through disruptive thoughts + feelings
- Practice mirror-work (aka speaking in the mirror to yourself with love and kindness)
- Start to build awareness over how you speak to yourself + make a constructive effort to speak to yourself as you would your best friend
- Practice radically accepting yourself, even when it feels difficult to do so
- Work with positive identity-shifting affirmations
Journal for Self Care + Love!
In this FREE downloadable digital journal, you can get started with journaling for self-care and love with 70 clear, guided prompts. Download for free now.
Other Posts About SELF CARE That You’ll LOVE
The Ultimate Self Care Checklist for Creatives
Why Self Care is an (EXTRA) Must for Business Owners
A Twist for Your Self Care Routine
